Sunday, September 14, 2008

Under our skin

I saw a wonderful documentary on Saturday called "Under our skin". It was terrifying, heart wrenching and very well done....I was in tears at several points throughout the film....cussing at others. It chronicled the lives of Lyme sufferers and their pain, frustration, anger and despair at not being able to find adequate treatment. It was a frightening look into our health care system, and a must-see for anyone who has the disease, as well as their friends, family and physicians.

My nephew came to visit today. We goofed around and chatted a bit while I sat in my office chair, which he decided to spin around with me still in it.....I was happy to play with him and tucked up my feet to spin in the chair as he giggled. After about 3 or 4 revolutions I began to feel equilibrium suddenly left me and I fell off the chair onto the floor. I tried to stand up but couldn't. He laid down next to me, his nose to mine and stroked my hair as I took deep breaths and waited for the room to stop spinning. I cursed in my head and wished that he didn't have to see me like that....he's only 8 years old. As I began to regain my balance I was able to pull myself up onto the bed. He helped me as much as his little arms would let him, and began holding up fingers in front of my eyes, asking how many I saw......" one.....four....two.....ten......" then began signing letters...."g.....r.....c..." and picking up objects from around the room...."cow....glue.....water..." to show me to "make sure your eyes are ok"....the next thing he held up was a roll of toilet paper I keep beside my desk.....I wanted to make him giggle so I said "cucumber". He gave me a very stern "I'm serious" look which didn't go away until I correctly identified the object. He's such a sweet little guy, I hate that he saw me that way, and I think it scared him a little. He climbed up on the bed with me and kept me company while I rested, laying his head on my tummy and doing silly things to make me laugh. I love him so much. OK, I'm gonna sign off before I start to cry.

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